Wisdom of the Rooms

"Anger is one letter away from Danger."

When I came into the program I was so angry, but I didn't realize how much. For years I had used drugs and alcohol to numb these feelings, to manage and hide them. When these were taken away, my anger quickly turned to rage, and I soon found that I had turned much of this rage inward. In fact today I still believe that a core characteristic of alcoholism is self-loathing.

Thank God for the Steps. By working the 12 Steps I learned to forgive others and myself, take responsibility for my part, and I learned how to surrender to a Higher Power. Slowly I began to release a lot of the shame and resentment that made up a lot of my rage.

But I still get angry sometimes. And these days I've learned that when I do get angry, I'm still in danger of turning it inward and acting in self-destructive ways. I'm quick to isolate and grow more depressed, to tell someone off and create resentments, or even to eat too much and go into self-loathing. Thankfully today I've learned to acknowledge and deal with my anger before it turns into rage.

Today I realize that anger is one letter away from danger.

Want to subscribe? Visit: http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com to sign up for FREE.

Wisdom of the Rooms

"Anger and resentment are masks for fear."

When I came into the program, I was pretty angry. With the alcohol and drugs gone, I very quickly got in touch with my feelings, and for me that meant my anger quickly turned into rage. Oh, and resentments - I had a lot of those as well. Without having developed the spiritual tools to deal with my feelings yet, I was pretty miserable.

As I began working my way through the program, I learned in the twelve and twelve that we were driven by a hundred forms of self centered fear. After doing a thorough 4th step that included a fear inventory, I found I was driven by way more than just a hundred! It took years, though, for me to realize the connection between my fears and the anger and resentment I felt.

Today I not only see the connection, but I feel it all the time. In fact, today I know that whenever I'm feeling uncomfortable, impatient, quick to snap at people, or just generally irritable, I'm usually in fear of something. And, again, the twelve and twelve tells me it's usually that I'm afraid of losing something or of not getting something I demand. The good news is that today I have a solution. Today, when I'm feeling angry or resentful, I stop and ask myself what I'm afraid of. Doing this allows me to take the mask off my fears and that always leads me to a solution.

___________________________________

Want to subscribe? Visit: http://www.theWisdomoftheRooms.com to sign up for FREE.