Getting Past Gambling

A place to come and share experiences, to find support and strength, for those of us who are putting gambling behind us and finding new exciting and happier ways to live our lives.
" You never achieve real success unless you like what you are doing."
*Dale Carnegie {1888-1955 American Author & Achievement Expert}


Saturday, July 09, 2005

Compulsive Gamblers Struggle To Stop Gambling Even Though They Know They Have A Problem Gambling

Every compulsive gambler has uttered the words “Please help me stop gambling” at one point or anther in their life. They continue to struggle on a daily basis to stop their hidden addiction. Unfortunately it goes unnoticed by co-workers, friends and family until things have gotten way out of control. They become frantic individuals looking for away out but no one hears their cries for help. Those closest to them know something’s wrong but don’t know what it is or what to do. The struggle continues until the compulsive gambler’s admits that they have a problem gambling. Even then it still is a struggle for the gambler to refrain from gambling.
The compulsive gambler's bills begin to pile up and they realize everyone is going to discover that they lost everything on a game of chance. The compulsive gambler looks back over the past few years and realizes what they had done to their life. They knew a year ago there was a problem gambling and they could have stopped, but they could not. They ask themselves “why is this happening to me?" And "What did I do to deserve this?” They never deliberately meant to hurt anyone. Their struggle to keep it in control became more and more difficult with each passing day. They sometimes begin to panic and see that there is no way out. They exhibit signs of hostility and emotional outbursts. Then the smallest amount of good news brings back their optimism. Their mind begins to wander and before you know it they are gambling again. Only to repeat the negative self destructive pattern over and over again. This is a terrible way for the gambler to live and their struggle to stop gambling continues.
Compulsive gamblers refuse to tell anyone how they are feeling inside which cause the self destructive behavior to continue. They don’t want anyone to know especially their family. However there are brief moments where they let their walls down and admit to a close friend that they are in trouble. The friend listens intently but has no immediate solution. The next time they see one another, nothing is mentioned and the friend assumes you have it under control. In reality you do not. You go back into your fantasy world and continue to gamble.
If a friend or family member realizes the struggle you are going through it’s time for them and you to take the initiative and confront the situation. There are self help stop gambling manuals, stop gambling websites and or Gamblers Anonymous. Starting to educate you on compulsive gambling addiction will help in the recovery.
A compulsive gambler needs their family and friends to help them with their struggle to stop gambling. This may be difficult for all involved since the gambler may have borrowed money in good faith and has no means to pay it back. This alone causes a compulsive gambler’s self esteem to decrease. This is also another reason there is a high rate of suicide among pathological gamblers.
Looking at the world out of a compulsive gamblers perspective is unique since there is limited statistical information on this addiction. A compulsive gambler once told me “I didn’t wake up one day and decide to lose everything I had worked the past twenty years for.” The same can be said for many other addictions. Everyone is unique and needs a recovery program tailored specifically to them.
A common mistake a compulsive gambler will make in their recovery is taking part in a recovery program they can not relate to. This slows down their recovery. The also may go back to gambling.
The gambler needs to start some where. With all the new alternative programs they eventually will find a program that will help them recover and rebuild their life.

3 Comments:

At 1:48 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You have just described my life. I guess I am not alone. I have been in alcohol and drug recovery program successfully for 8 years but the addiction monster just shifts from one compulsive behavior to another. Now I MUST accept that I am powerless.

 
At 8:57 am, Blogger LindaH said...

Hello "anonymous",
Sorry to hear you are struggling with the gambling monster. Accepting our powerlessness over any addiction is difficult to do as it seems to take a hold of us without us realizing it's tight grasp.
If you wish to "talk" to others in the same situation and please check out the Message board at the top right of this screen and perhaps consider joining us and learning with us how to overcome this addiction.

 
At 8:17 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

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